yesterday's activity ended up with half of the patrol crying.
xw (unknown reason) followed by all of my sec2s, and ly.
I guess I'm the heartless one then.
second last jihe that we're planning for guides.
never really thought about it until they mentioned it.
it's been a long way.
like after becoming sec4 guides became rather dull because its mostly planning and less of what we're actually doing.
and suddenly its all ending, very soon.
I'm not a person to connect well with people.
through this year, I didnt really make a special effort to connect well with my two batches (not counting sec1s) of juniors.
I know them and how they are in general, but not to the extent of knowing each one of them well and really try to bring out the best in them.
in this aspect, I failed.
to me, xw is the one who will care for them and really join in the fun.
ly is the 'big sister' kind of figure to them.
and I'm always the one just passing msgs and making the decisions, and planning the activities.
it's my rightful duty, I know.
but sometimes it saddens me to see that the jnrs will go to xw/ly and start crapping about themselves and everything and they just come to me with questions, and I'm just supposed to tell them what to do, yes or no, this or that, approve or disapprove etc.
but sometimes, I rather them not approach me to talk about life.
I'm weird.
P4 is a bonded patrol, really.
and I'm glad to be able to be in this big happy family.
but maybe I should've done more.
it feels funny to blog about this in a saturday afternoon.
the time when I really need to finish up the work I'm doing before going for church,
but somehow just have this weird heck care attitude.
this is bad.
jiayou to sec3s for pltc (: